Friday, October 1, 2010

Grave Concerns

Say you: What that a cemetery?  What on earth does THAT have to do with consumerism? 
Say me: Oh, dear reader.  Death is big business.  Even when we kick it, we can't escape the ensuing costs of that privilege.  
The average funeral in America costs between seven and nine thousand dollars.  The break down for the costs include everything from the use of the funeral home to the casket, but not necessarily a limo ride to the graveyard and certainly not flowers.  Sure, in small towns the funeral home may be a very profitable family affair, but there are several "death services" companies that are publicly traded on Wall Street. Meaning they're kinda like Applebees on behalf of the Grim Reaper. You can purchase insurance for your funeral, for crying out loud.  You can upgrade your send-off, or you can go economical and buy your coffin at Costco.... 
(Say you: Don't be crass.
Say me: I linked to it, didn't I?)
OR, if you want to be cremated but still want an open casket viewing of your corpse, you can rent a coffin for a mere thousand clams a day.  You can go to school and earn a degree in Expiration Management, or whatever it's called. It's a multi-billion dollar affair, this dying thing. 

Urn you glad I warned you?  -> 


Cynthia said...

Have you ever read the American Way of Death, by Jessica Mitford? If not, you must! And also Evelyn Waugh's the Loved One -- I actually like the movie better than the book. Highly recommend.

Aynatt said...

I haven't seen either, Cynthia, but I will. Thanks for the heads. Those sound right up my alley.

Carolyn said...

They are definitely of the "hit you while you're down" school. And have you priced out the cost of obits in your local daily? As for the pun, you will be punished!!!! (I'm such a wit!)

Baysage said...

Mitford's book outraged me years ago when it was new. It's probably dated now, and things are much, much worse. I've always said I wanted as little expense as possible for that final little trip. And I mean really, really the cheapest, if such a thing is possible.