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I'm not a huge flip-flop girl, but these babies make my feet feel like they're the only pair of feet on the planet.  ->

Rapid

I don't keep acetaminophen in the house any longer, but generic drugs are the bees knees. ->

Sea Salt

 

Yes, please.  ->

Sympathy

I had to buy three of them today.  Life is short. Hug your family, let your friends know you love them. ->

tip

Yet another name that's branded so the generic versions can't be an eponym, thus have to be called something ridiculous. 

Look, a Q-tip is a Q-tip.   A Q-tip is not a "Cotton Tipped Swab" or "Swab Tipped with Cotton" or "Nose Cleaner" or "Potential Ear Drum Popper" or anything of the like.  Although, once upon a time they were called "Baby Gays".  Seriously.  I can't make this stuff up.  ->

rasp

Day four of no school, snow on the ground, below freezing temperatures, iced over streets and a family of four slowly going mad. 


Bonus! It snowed ALL day.  


Here are some things I've learned: 


1. It is important to buy provisions. As the picture above will indicate, I didn't buy enough on Monday and was thus forced to stock up today.  
2. This is totally true.
3. When you go to get a pedicure, it's best to wait until there's not three feet of snow on the ground. Because those little flip-flop thingys they give you to protect your newly painted tootsies will not keep your feet warm.  Or dry.  
4. Snow, when it encounters temperatures above freezing, melts.  And then, despite strategically placed towels at all points of exit and entry in your house, you end up with puddles of (really cold) water every. Where. 
5. Inquisitive teenagers with an insatiable appetite for knowledge are likely to pilfer your non-fiction library books. 
6. It is possible to work out at home.  What one needs to keep in mind, however, is that the walls in your living room are closer together than say, the walls in the aerobic room at the YMCA. 
7. And that living room throw rug can literally trip you up when working out, so take heed. 
8. There were a lot of dust bunnies living under said throw rug. 
9. I'm not sure I even like that throw rug.  ->


But I love this song.  Go ahead.  Mock me.  I could not care less. 

OK

I just picked up a book on this subject in the library and am looking forward to reading it.  Here's to hoping I won't drop said book in a puddle of water and consequently have to buy it.  For $24.  Which sort of defeats the purpose of, you know, the library. 

Say you: I guess you dropped a library book in a puddle of water?  

Say me: I'm bitter.  -> 

11

 

Because this is what we all need.  Cute, dated stuffed animals. ->

All Dressed Up and Lost Her Head

I'm completely demoralized.  

I had this nice entry all worked up in my head which included multiple pictures.  I was walking down memory lane and even included the phrase "tongue like butter" in my original text. Which should be enough to make you sit up straighter, right?  I'd been typing for the last 45 minutes and was almost done when something...happened.  

I'm not sure why, but Blogger didn't auto-save tonight.  So when I returned to my draft the only thing that was there for me to work with was the original picture.  

At which point I said something quite loudly that is not safe for youngsters' ears.  

Sorry, but I just can't purge all that again. Maybe later, but I'm plum tuckered out. ->

Pose

Quirky tidbit: I love mannequins and want one for my very own. Like, really bad.  So if you know of any lying around.... ->

Nestled

I have to say, what you are seeing here ranks up there as one of my top pet peeves.  One gallon of milk, that comes packaged with its own handle for easy carrying, double-bagged at the grocery store because it might break through just a single. And nothing else in the bags. 

Generally I'm more aware of the baggers at the check-out.  Generally I'm armed with enough of my reusable bags to not warrant any plastic ones issued by the store for "free".  Generally I'm paying attention and will stop the double-bagging of milk, even if I'm forced to use the store-issued plastic ones for whatever reason (read: forgot my reusable bags.  Which I keep in my car.  In the front. In the driver's side door pocket for easy access.) Generally, even when I have my reusable bags, I don't take up valuable real estate in them with milk.  Because, as I said earlier, it comes with its own handle. 

Today I was off my game in all kinds of ways. I attribute this to the fact that I didn't have my first Diet Coke of the day until 3 hours after I snapped this shot, which proves unequivocally that I was mentally disabled for over 6 hours. -> 

Zer

I've no doubt that as I was standing in the check-out line at Target, waiting to purchase my over-sized can of diced tomatoes along with other essentials, that the people behind me seriously questioned my mental faculties when I started snapping pictures of batteries.  ->

eggs

Say you: This is not a Christmas photo.  I was expecting....

Say me: Listen, I act on the opportunities.  And no one can over look a convenient store with an entire outside wall that is covered in mosaic.  

Take a gander:  

click to enlarge for details

How extraordinary is that?  Two days in a row and I hit the mother-load of photogenic objects. It's a Christmas miracle!  I'm sure I won't see anything like this again until I'm on day 363, so you know I'm going to post more than one pic. 

 I took several pics of course.  But I gotta tell ya, it was bloody cold out there and the lighting was not so great with the overcast skies and hello! it's Christmas eve and I've sorta got merlot on board, so I'm only going to offer a couple of more.  ICE! 

and my handsome son, AKA "The Boy". ->

Ho

Colds

Not be be outdone by the coupling of Darth Mart and McDonalds, the Super Target in my area has not only Coldstone Creamery and Starbucks, but serves Pizza Hut pizza too.  

I say it's merely a marriage of convenience.  Thrice over.  Target's a polygamist. ->

Big Hunk

  

For reasons that remain unclear to me, I gave up eating candy over a year ago.  At the time it seemed like a good idea.  And most days it's not really a problem anymore, although the first week or so nearly sent me over the edge.  

But every so often, I'll encounter something like Big Hunks, which gets me all twitterpated and consequently unleashes chatter in my brain that is akin to the Cookie Monster conversing with Dr. Phil.

To wit: 

CM: ***SQUEE***  

DP: Do not buy. You don't want to ruin your candy sobriety on these.  

CM: But I went through so much trouble to bring them into my life! After I read this book it took me months weeks days hours to locate them.  And I hardly ever see them. 

DP: Do not buy. Calories not worth it.  

CM: OMG! OMG! OMG!    

DP: You'll feel guilty.  

CM: Love. 

DP: Did you hear me? 

CM: Want.

DP: Do NOT buy. 

CM: Om, nom, nom, nom 

DP: Fine, loser.  Buy the candy.  But you need to get real about why you're doing this.  

Did not buy.  Took pic, walked away and blogged instead. Score one for Dr. Phil.  Bastard. ->

20642

Corky

Say you:  It's a dog.  What on earth does a DOG have to do with consumerism? 


OK, look.  First of all, this is not just a dog.  This is a designer dog.  English bulldogs can run over a thousand bucks, which is sorta outrageous for a canine, especially when there are millions of dogs that get the ax each year. That being said, this particular one was a rescue.


But that's not why I took a picture of her. 


You know how some businesses have a shtick?  Well, Corky happens to foot the bill for Corkscrew Wine and Spirits in Norman, OK.  ANY time you go into this particular liquor store, Corky is there, just doing what bulldogs do. Which is not much. But she will pass gas that is vile enough to down a moose if you make her nervous, so tread lightly when you first meet her. 


The family who owns the store has been running it for about a decade.  Corky's predecessor, Bailey, also hung out in the store daily from open to close. He was a huge hit with the locals and even garnered an obituary in the local paper* when he passed four years ago.  That obituary led to a breeder calling the store and offering them Corky for free.  You see, she had done her time. She had given him two litters and was therefore of no more use to him.  When the store got her, she was a nervous wreck and not house trained. 


So kudos to Corkscrew for keeping the Spirit of Bailey alive (he's memorialized on one of the walls), rescuing a dog, and giving much joy to the patrons of their establishment.  I don't go there often because there's a great liquor store not even a mile from my place.  But when I do, the first thing I do is locate the dog.  I swear to you, there's never been a time when I've gone in there and a bulldog wasn't there.  It's awesome. 

Say you: How much booze did you buy from these guys to get The Corky Tale? 

Say me: Are you kidding?  I'm giving them free advertising! My vast readership will bring them buckets of cash.   ......

........


Ok I bought two bottles of pinot grigio and had them on the counter with my wallet out before I started chatting up the dude on duty.  He gave me the full history and offered Corky treats so she would pose for me.  


If you're ever in town, you should make a point of stopping by and rubbing her butt, because she really likes that.  -> 


*For the life of me, I couldn't find the article on their site or Google.  I wonder if their archives go back that far? I tried calling the newsroom and got routed to voice mail.  Yeah.  I'm that anal.  

Redbox

Extra

   

Rows upon rows of baskets filled with detritus waiting to be restocked on the shelves and therefore reintroduced to the masses.  I counted 13 of them this morning. 

Can you imagine that being your job?  Every day you walk in with the burning question: "How much crap will be waiting for me today?"  I'm sure it's never ending feedback loop, working in a big box store and having to reshelve* merchandise day in and day out.  How repetitive that must feel after a while.  

Of course, every time I go to work, someone is suicidal...

*Reshelf? What does the Eat, Shoot, Leaves lady say about this one?